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...the blog of the biggest idiot in the world! Yes, you read right, kids. Because only the biggest idiot in the world would leave their purse in the basket at Target! And only the biggest idiot in the world would not notice for half a day that they were missing something vital to, say... go out to lunch or finish a perfect outfit. My outfit was not perfect today (unless I was attending a Trailer park Troubadours concert. Example below.). But I did need my purse to pay for the lunch I was planning on eating with a friend. It was only when I parked at the restaurant that I realized I needed money to pay for lunch. I could have gotten it for free on my good looks, but you've seen the picture of the day's motif :(. So, I tried to remember where I left my purse. Hmmmm... I have been up and at 'em since 6:00, so there was a few places to choose from. I had decided that the most logical place was my mother-in-law's house. I called her place and asked about the purse. No luck. Called the next logical place- Target. I was lead through an automated menu that told me all kinds of information about the wonders of the Target corporation and such. I could touch a number on my keypad and be whisked off to magical places. Like, the electronics department, children's department- but alas, no department for the complete idiot who left a valuable accessory in a red shopping cart. I finally got through to someone. She was very helpful in making me wait on the line for 11 minutes and abruptly disconnecting my pleasant journey of muzak. Gosh, how I love Kenny G in a frustrating situation. After calling back the second time, I got to talk to someone. Here's how it went:

Me: Hi, I think I got disconnected the first time. Did I leave my purse at your store?

Unhelpful minimum wage teenager: Yeah, uhhhhhh, hold on.

Me:(after 7 minutes of waiting) So, did you find it?

Unhelpful minimum wage teenager: Yeah, I think so. Could you describe it?

Me: Well, it's black, with great buckles on the side, and it has a black wallet inside... oh yeah! and a jar of curry simmer sauce from Trader Joe's! (I thought that was sooo funny, so I giggled- I'll admit it- curry does strange things to me.)

Unhelpful minimum wage teenager: (not laughing. Well, maybe not with me.) yeah... that's it.

Me: I'll be right down!

I zoomed down to Target, ran up to the service desk and waited in line. When it was my turn, I mentioned why I was there. The teenager behind the desk asked me again to describe the bag. Thinking it would be funny the second time I mentioned it to her, I said, " It has a jar of curry simmer sauce from Trader Joe's. Hahahaha....(laughter tapers off. I guess it's not funny the second time.)" The teenager asked me if there was anything else I could describe. WHAT?!?! you mean a jar of deliciousness isn't enough? So, I am still the biggest idiot in the world- but I have a sense of humor about it and I am eating fantastically while I'm at it.