What's your score?

A few years ago, I came up with a game that makes me happy. Because, I nearly always win. Scratch that, I always win.

Here's the game: Dork Snort

Rules: For each time a player does something that qualifies as 'dorky', the other players must award points, ranging from 1 to 3. You know, like how many snorts you would cough up for level of dorkiness. For example- If you stumble while walking along a level surface, that's 1 point. If you stumble while walking on a level surface, have an exaggerated large trip, but regain your senses, that's 2 points. If you are walking and fall flat on your face, that's an easy 3 points.
Then the person receiving points would snort the appropriate number of times.

It's not an 'everyone take turns' game, just a running tally of daily events.
Every year at girls' camp we play. In fact, I am usually playing (with myself) everyday. That explains a lot, huh?


The good news?

I'm not dead.
The bad news?
I have strep...

and apparently for over a month. I was scolded by the doctor for not complaining enough- she's never been to our house. At one point during the appointment she actually took a mirror off the wall to point out how I shouldn't be able to breathe. Niiiice... if I'm going to kill myself slowly, I choose to go by a food induced coma.

p.s.- I love my doctor sooo much. I always feel validated and unrushed. Plus, her scarf was super cute today. If you have Kaiser, you should ask to be Dr. Carol Besana's patient, she's rad.


A smatter of pictures



Hello Karma,

we meet again.

So, remember the post about me giving Jimmy the silent treatment? Yeah, so do I.
Why: After numerous reminders, starting in January, that I wanted to do something fabulous for my birthday weekend, I find out less than a week before my birthday that nothing has been planned.
How: I threw a 'it's my party and I'll cry if I want' hissy fit and launched into the silent treatment, including the full head turn when husband zooms in for a kiss.
Repercussions: Jimmy went into full planning mode and pulled an event schedule out of thin air. I was very pleased with the results. Stephanie started talking to her poor husband again.

However, my good friend Karma, had other plans. On the morning of my birthday, I woke up with the most excruciating pain in my throat. That's how any sickness starts for me. I was really not feeling the day. Crawling back into bed was the ideal, but Jimmy was not letting his plans go by the wayside. So, off we went to Denny's for free breakfast. FREE! Then, I wanted to get the car washed. Off we went to Classic Car Wash. It was FREE! Gosh, I had really gotten used to this whole whip out your id for free stuff day. Also on the list of free stuff on your birthday: a flower at Beau Fleurs, dessert at Applebee's, $30 at Benihahna's (sign up and they'll send your a gc), steak dinner at Black Angus, sombrero at Chevy's, ice cream at Coldstone, personal pizza at Roundtable and many, many more... Seriously, you can have an amazing birthday for free if you just jump from one place to another with your license flashing.
But I digress...
We drove to Sonoma and had a great time going to all the shops. Highlight? Tiddle E Winks- the best little vintage candy shop ever! I got some pretty sweet candy (that pun was intended) and a couple of vintage charms to go on a necklace. Oh yeah, and some FREE candy because it was my birthday! Plus, the very best gift I could have asked for: The sales clerk was very friendly and noticed I was singing along with Beatles album she had playing. We struck up a conversation about the Beatles and I mentioned how my six year old daughter's favorite album is the Abbey Road album. The clerk looked quizzical and said, "You have a six year old daughter?"
"Yes," I responded.
Then she said (bless her heart), "I thought you two were newlyweds. Just the way he looks at you with such adoration, I was sure you were here on your honeymoon." Awww... I probably shouldn't mention the silent treatment just recently administered, huh?

As the day continues, the chills set in and I got a pretty high fever. What we ended up missing: dinner reservations, hotel check-in (that's an embarrassing story where the concierge called repeatedly looking for us until giving up and leaving our key under the mat) and good night's sleep. We ditched the hotel a night early and left at 7:30am, swung by Bouchon Bakery for some takeout pastries and went home to sleep.

So the final result: Stephanie, the silent treatment administrator, ends up in bed missing more than half of the activities planned for 'the most fabulous birthday weekend ever'. And Jimmy, the silent treatment sufferer, gets to play videos games for the majority of the weekend while wife is silent as the dead and daughter is at Nana's.
Karma, such a fair weather friend.


breaking the mold

Netflix is my buddy.
I love watching the instant streaming movies and shows, especially the ones they predict I'll love. Well, I recently watched Bonneville, a movie that was suggested to me by my buddy.
It wasn't terrible, but there was one thing in particular that bothered me.
There was a character that was the 'stuffy Mormon'.
The movie writers got the technical parts of Mormonism right... but man, oh, man!!! I am glad I don't fit in to the stereotype that was presented on the big screen.
First of all, the character seemed to be acting in such a way that she resented what she was choosing to do. That she was sorry she couldn't drink coffee, gamble or get drunk. This woman seemed to be the weak link of the friendship. The worry wart. The boring one. Ha!

I want to say right now that the only women I have met that practice their religion (any religion) in that manner- are not happy. The convictions are nearly nonexistent and there's nothing to keep you satisfied in the relationship with your church or deity.
There is a sense of strength that comes from choosing what you know to be right and sticking with it.
With faith comes the desire to do much good in the world, and usually not in an abrasive way that is demeaning to others. I admire all those that readily discuss their beliefs, no matter what sect. I take great comfort in being surrounded by wonderful examples of what a woman should be.
Every religious friend I have is a force to be reckoned with. I love them all. I look up to the beacon they reveal. There is no wishy washy temperament that meanders its way through their choices. And they are definitely not boring...

Can I get an amen?!


Poor guy

I haven't done it in years... but Jimmy is getting the silent treatment.
Have not stooped this low in a long time.
I feel so immature- and smug.
But I will win...

*I'll update when I start talking again.



It's been awhile.

I miss blogging.

Here's what's been going on recently:
I was damned to hell by some evangelists on my way into a Muse concert. These religious zealots handed out 'tickets' to hell... yeah, I'm pretty sure that's not the way to win anyone over. Couldn't you just see it? An attendee of the concert on their way into, quite possibly, the best concert ever say, "You know, you're right. I will not go in there! I will save my soul this very minute!" Haha. I did not bite.

Jimmy and I have been doing P90X (a rigorous exercise and nutrition program) and we love it! Maybe not so much the stand on your head part of the yoga dvd...

Kaitlin went on her first field trip of the year. Her class went to the library and fire station. Let me just say this- any field trip with beautiful and buff men (in uniform, no less) will be chaperoned by yours truly.

Easter was very special. I loved hearing the wonderful words of inspiration and hope from the leaders of our church.

Ycl sleepover= awesome! We had a ton of girls over. The best part? They all went to bed around 12:30.

The strawberry stand is open and I have contributed much to their commerce already.

The weather has been like a girl lately... cannot make up it's mind. "Do I want to rain? Should I be sunny? Do these clouds make me look fat?"

I will post pictures when the freakin' slow internet stops wheezing out my most recent request.