4.16.2009

Yet, another bird story


I seem to have a history with fowl. and shoes. and food. That's pretty much all I blog about. Sometimes my family.... sometimes.
Well, this is story from the archives in my head. I was only three years old, but I remember this. Trust me. I remember.

We lived on a large lot out in the country. There must be an unspoken rule (one I will never follow, judging by my luck with birds) for those who live in the country to have a chicken coop. Yes, we had a chicken coop... one that was lit on fire by my brothers in a future funny post. But for now, the coop remains intact. All the kids were playing outside in the backyard when my mother heard screaming from her only daughter. My mother ran out of the house to find her sweet, most precious and innocent daughter laying on the ground. With a rooster on her chest. Pecking at her face. YES! That was ME!!!! I was being pecked by a rooster! It was totally clawing me, too! Now, folks. I do not remember provoking this evil spawn of Satan. However, with a quick read through my blog, I am sure it's safe to say that I wanted to hold the evil thing and tame it...
So, my mom ran back into the house and returned with a broom to the scene of the attack. Instead of just shooing the bird away in the sweet manner of the animated Cinderella, my awesome mother swung that broom much like the Queen of Hearts from Alice in Wonderland swings a croquet mallet. (Now, there is a reason I use animated characters to demonstrate what I remember- I was three. And let's face it, I still equate many memories I currently entertain with animated movies)That broom came up and around my mom's head and swung under the rooster's behind to make it go flying! I distinctly remember a kind of weird 'gobble/cawcaw' coming from that rooster. My mom just kept on swinging the broom under the rooster's behind to sent it into orbit and eventually the chicken coop. And thus Stephanie and nemesis foul begin their long and complicated relationship.

4 comments:

Nikki said...

Oh you poor child! Well, your poor mother! I bet that gave her a heart attack!

esther peterson said...

OMG!!!
and I thought I had a difficult life with my two brothers jajaja. I am glad the rooster did not hurt you bad. I love your stories, bring them on girl!

Kelly said...

I love it! I can't perfectly imagine the whole thing. Too awful, too funny...and totally YOU!

Sarah Lane Studios said...

Oh my gosh!! I am so thankful that I was not drinking any liquids as I read this because it would not have been pretty!! The part about Queen of Hearts was hilarious!! You poor thing!